Friday, October 29, 2004

Two Thumbs Up

Newsflash Update: Bin Laden Video

In his latest video, Bin Laden plays Roger Ebert and gives Michael Moore's Fahrenheit 9/11 two thumbs up.

Pet goats, Florida elections, Saudi connections, and the Patriot Act are all recounted like a teenager after his 20th viewing of the Rocky Horror Picture Show.

One can picture Osama late at night huddled in the corner of a Karachi flophouse, remote control in hand, replaying the outtakes and extra scenes on DVD - "we should offer the fat infidel a job at Al-Jazeera."

Meanwhile Moore's accomplices in the U.S. are busy spinning their impending defeat:

"Were bin Laden to turn the election for Bush, it would be fitting since he and Bush have fed off each others' power for more than three years."

So sayeth the Left's leading blogmeister. The Bush victory will be explained away as the result of Bin Laden's 11th hour re-emergence, Bush's exploitation of the 9/11 attacks, and the electorate's irrational, non-nuanced world views. Add a dash of moral equivalence and you've got a nice, cool, refreshing glass of Kool-Aid.

Let them have their fantasies. This victory will be an unequivocal repudiation of Moore, Soros, Dean, Kerry, Kennedy, Edwards, Springsteen, Franken, and that distinguished newsman Jon Stewart.

And then we can get on with the War on Terror. For this movie, it's time to shoot UBL's death scene.